spoofer: (Default)
Xistentia: Mod ([personal profile] spoofer) wrote 2017-05-31 03:42 pm (UTC)

All the new your revisions you wrote look good.

The only outstanding question seems to be how D.E.S.T.I.N.Y. appeared. This can be very brief, but 'things fall apart' may be confusing as it can imply everything from disintegrating human flesh to collapsing buildings. What we would like is at least 1 specific or evocative line or phrase about D.E.S.T.I.N.Y.'s appearance. For example:
    A windstorm
  • An invading army carrying lasers
  • An earthquake
  • The buildings crumble into lava
As you are part of a group app feel free to talk to the other players and maybe they can help you if you're unclear about the circumstances of their departure.

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